Some days, when I wake up, I feel like I lost something.
It doesn’t always feel important. Losing a book because you left it behind on public transport might invoke a similar feeling. Other times though, the moment you regain full consciousness is the moment you find your mind grasping for things that never were. The most fleeting of memories, taking away as much as it they had given.
Days on which it happens are days on which you can’t help daydream more than usual. Trying to hold on to what little you have left, replaying the same tiny details over and over in your mind until only one feeling remains to focus on. Not much later, that too fades.
A daze comes to replace it as you wonder how many lifetimes you have lived and forgotten. How many experiences have passed you by, leaving not even the faintest trace of the impact you thought them to have on you. It has always been but a mirage.
It’s time to go to bed again.