Just fuck my shit up.
If there’s one thing I hate more than the endless spiral of increasingly empty hopes and dreams, it’s exactly that, but with physical discomfort on top. It’s not like I’m sitting on my chair in some reverse master-level yoga pose in an attempt to view my monitor through my third eye. I’m just sitting. Not even really slouching, just sitting somewhat comfortably. But like good ones, neutral things degrade when you do them too frequently.
Fuck, I even put a box under my feet so they wouldn’t dangle when I adjust my chair high enough for my arms to reach the surface of my desk. That same chair I spent half a fucking hour adjusting but still won’t support my back right. A fear is whispering in my ear that I may not know how to sit in a chair properly. Is that even a skill you can forget? Doesn’t matter, all seated positions hurt now.
I care enough about my physical health and ability to get through my day without wrist, arm, back and leg pains to take short breaks, do small exercises and endlessly complain about how much it all sucks. But for some reason I don’t care enough to invest in good equipment that will help support my desk-heavy lifestyle. It’s a lot of money, sure, but it’s not like I can’t afford it. I just… can’t be bothered or something? What the fuck is wrong with me.
Okay, vent over. Sorry. Going to wake up tomorrow and feel better again, but hey, it will return.