Fang Talks

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11 04 14

Caves, p78

Just got an idea for a nice plot element, but then realized I will not be able to write a smooth follow-up. Aww. (previous)

‘Yo, Mitch!’ Andrea barged into his room. Apparently he had forgotten to lock the door in his haste to get some much-needed sleep.
Sleep which was being rudely interrupted, only a short five hours in. Mitchell groaned, half-heartedly waved an arm around in the air, and turned around.
‘It’s past twelve already,’ She jumped onto the bed, which creaked under their collective weight. ‘Time to get up!’
Mitchell made a fart noise with his mouth. ‘Just lemme sleep,’ he sighed. ‘Or at least talk softer.’
Without lowering her volume, Andrea rambled on. ‘Come on Mitch, there’s this job we need to take.’ She prodded at him. ‘Don’t want anyone to beat us to it!’
‘Fuck, fine.’ Mitchell sat upright and locked her in the eyes. ‘It better be good though.’

‘The fuck is this?’ Mitchell stared at the job offer. It was a hastily written note, scribbled onto worn paper in childish handwriting, barely readable. ‘It doesn’t even state a reward… I think?’
Andrea pulled his face closer to the job board. ‘Look, it’s signed.’ She moved her finger under the letters as she slowly read them. ‘Mara.’
‘You don’t think..?’ Mitchell shook his head. ‘Nah, no way.’
‘From what I heard this thing just appeared overnight. The Bastion’s clients don’t usually come here during those late hours.’ She unpinned the offer from the board. ‘It isn’t very clean either, dead giveaway.’
‘We don’t even know what it says though.’ He put his hands on his head and threw another look at the paper in Andrea’s hands. ‘I don’t read second-grade.’
‘What? Looks like English to me.’ She squinted. ‘But yeah, definitely hard to read.’ Her lips moved around as she moved the message away from her face in an attempt to decipher it. ‘Meet at… camp? What camp?’
A smile appeared on Mitchell’s face when he realized it. ‘Pretty clever, that kid. She’s referring to the place we first met.’

I couldn’t let the idea go so I went and put it in anyway. God help me now, future me’s going to be so mad at me. (Actually no I just thought something up that ties in really well with previous events.) (next)
~ Fang


  • Eric
    28/04/2014 (6:04 PM)

    I saw the heading and thought “I wonder if you’ve realised similarities between writing prose and writing code.”

  • 14/04/2014 (5:36 PM)

    I was going to just suggest that you go with the idea anyway. I’ve done that before, and then just seen what I end up writing down the line. It’s a fun little challenge, and one you seem to be doing good at.

  • 14/04/2014 (3:01 PM)

    “Only a SHORT five hours in?” Man, I get five hours on a good day…

    I absolutely love the line “I don’t read second-grade.” That’s the kind of dialogue that makes this (and your characters) pop. Well done!

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